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Join Kelly and Raphaela Browne as they talk about obstacles of women entering the corporate world and how to overcome them.
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Welcome to hidden human, the Podcast where we explore the stories behind the business leader. Get ready to hear insights from business leaders speaking candidly about how they became who they are today, and the lessons they learned along the way. And now, here’s your host, leadership coaching speaker, Kelly Meerbott.
Kelly Meerbott 13:25:59
Welcome to this space where we share our personal humanity to connect with our shared collective humanity. It is my pleasure. And I have been anticipating and so excited and enthusiastic about this interview for so long to introduce Raphaela Browne, CEO of Raphaela Browne enterprises. Thank you so much for coming on.
Raphaela Browne 13:26:21
And thank you for having me.
Kelly Meerbott 13:26:23
Yeah. Okay. So are you okay with us diving right in and just chatting about who you are? Let’s go. So if I were a six year old child, how would you explain in a way that I can understand where I failed? What it is that you do at Raphaela Browne enterprises and beyond? Because I know you’re so much more than what you do for a living? So what would you say to me?
Raphaela Browne 13:26:47
And I love that question, too. The first thing that comes to mind is, you know, I would tell that, and I thought of a little six year old girl, I help people who are scared about moving past their big fears. You know, I really helped them work through that. So they’re not scared anymore. And they go off to do like, amazing, magical things. So, yeah,
Kelly Meerbott 13:27:15
and that, and honestly, I’ve had the pleasure of knowing you what, for almost a year now. Yeah. And we’re doing some projects together, which is amazing. And I get to bear witness to your energy and your magic. So where my mind went, and I was listening to that answer was what like, if could you tell me about a time in your childhood? Like between the ages of eight and 14? Because usually that’s where our defining moments happen, where you moved past your big fear, whatever that was in your mind, and create a magic from that moment?
Raphaela Browne 13:27:50
That is such a good question. So let me let me chill on that for a moment.
Kelly Meerbott 13:27:55
So can that
Raphaela Browne 13:27:57
when I moved past my fears? I don’t know why one comes. But I want to give. So I’ll start off here. But then I want to think a little bit deeper. So growing up, I was definitely the, the, the quiet, shy. Child, right. You know, I did super well in school. You know, I had friends but always like, you know, quiet girl. I remember being at camp. And you know, behind the scenes, I was a good dancer, right? I’ll dance. You put on some music, I’ll dance. And so my friends knew that. And so this is I was age 12 or whatever. And so I remember there was this girl, you know, she was more outgoing. And you know, she would do all the dances. And one of my friends. And a counselor was like, you know how to dance. Once you get out there on the floor. I was like, like, no, not me. And they’re like, Raphaela is going up. She’s gonna battle you. And I was like, Oh, shoot. And so they put the music on it was like go and I just let myself go not feel restricted. There was no choreographed moves. I was just dancing with the music and feeling it. And then people were cheering me on. And so, you know, while I thought this moment was like, Maybe I shouldn’t bring it up. But as I’m talking about it, it was just like, Yeah, you know, I danced in that moment. I got a chance to step out of my fear of, I guess not being good enough or let me play the background. And then that moment, I didn’t pay attention to no one else in the room. I was doing my thing. Yeah.
Kelly Meerbott 13:29:51
Yeah, it’s so okay. I don’t know if you’ve watched the show. And if you haven’t, you have to go watch it. It’s called Lovecraft country. It’s on HBO. And there is the scene where one of the main characters talks about being a black woman in America and you are you and I both know that our country is is not as friendly to your community as it is to mine period like exactly. I have to argue that but what she talks about and like there’s a science fiction piece to it, and I don’t want to tell you all about it because I don’t want to ruin the plot. When she realizes that she has been living her life and create thing herself, based on what other people were telling her was acceptable. And she said over time, she became smaller and smaller. But she has this epiphany and this other moment that I want to tell you, where she becomes really expansive and huge. And so like, when you were talking about dancing, like I saw, well, first, the question, the question popped in my mind was, were you quiet by choice? Or was it because of societal cultural pressure saying, Be quiet. And then when you danced for me, like, I see baby Rafi held in my mind and like, all of the conditioning, because that’s really all it is. Right? We, you and I work with mine. So we know that, that all of this is conditioning, and you just literally threw off the, you know, the, the constructions and became expansive, that’s sort of what I saw.
Raphaela Browne 13:31:27
And exactly it it really, and you know, I grew up in a single parent household mom worked super hard, and, you know, was taught that girls are, you listen, you ply it, you speak when spoken to, you know, don’t go out this house embarrassed, and may you know, and, you know, I, I knew my mom was working hard, and I wanted to be a good girl. And I’ve seen her, you know, in moments of stress, and I didn’t want to add more stress. So I want to say that, that was part of the conditioning. And then also, I wanted to present like, you know, a good girl.
Kelly Meerbott 13:32:07
Yeah, you know, and I can, I can relate to that so much, because my mother, so I grew up in a Catholic household, my mother was a Catholic school girl with perfectionism issues. So I would see the stress all the time and the same thing. And she, my sister had some learning issues. So I noticed there was a lot of stress in that area. And I was like, hey, I can be quiet, and I can straight A’s and I can do this. And you know, and then I started finding my voice. And people really didn’t like that.
Raphaela Browne 13:32:41
They don’t, they don’t, it’s just like, whoa, like, Who are you to start saying that, but I didn’t. It was a journey for me to finally get to like, owning who I was my voice stepping out of the shadows, and like, tell me dancing freely.
Kelly Meerbott 13:32:59
Tell me more about that. I’m really interested.
Raphaela Browne 13:33:02
So so, you know, like I said, 12, that was the dance moment, it was friend, because I always admired people who were just like, I’m, I’m just going to get out there and do it, whatever. And I was just like, oh, my gosh, you know, I wish I was free like that. So I definitely was in the role of good girl straight A’s high school, you know, the whole path to college, you go to college, you get a job, I did all that I excel, National Honor Society, so on and so forth. And it got to a point. I’m going all the way up until, you know, I got to, I just kept excelling at work. My goal was to climb the ladder. And so I got a position, you know, after college, get masters working for a couple years, got a major job. And it was to provide, what was it like training and oversee organizations within the city, you know, and manage millions of dollars in before proof portfolio for these companies, these organizations,
Kelly Meerbott 13:34:17
which city Raphaela, Philadelphia, okay,
Raphaela Browne 13:34:21
Philadelphia, and so I when I got that job, I was like, I’m about to make some have a powerful impact. I’m gonna do some things. And I just started seeing like, everything wasn’t cut out. Supposed to be at the top, you know, just because I was
Kelly Meerbott 13:34:41
telling me what you saw, because one of the things I really love about you and I want and just talking to powerful women like you is, I want young women, whether they’re your daughter’s age, or, you know, my my best friend, Coco’s daughter Coco is five like I want her to listen to the Cinco. They did it, I can do it. And I mean, so tell us what you were seeing when you walked in there? Like I know what you mean like you have this optimistic like, oh, it’s gonna be great. I’m gonna be powerful impact and then you meet all these people who are like, literally and I’ve worked with the city of Philadelphia so know exactly where you’re going, but we’re there throwing up obstacles in your way where we really don’t need them.
Raphaela Browne 13:35:28
Well, first off for was called lots of red tape, lots of politics, lots of games, I like to say, within the office, so office politics, and I came in there with a pure heart, you know, but not knowing that there’s all this underlying gunk, to really try to, if you could even make a difference get to it. So when I got there, you know, I was charged with Director of Programs. And this, unbeknownst to me was literally two major roles combined into one that they did. And I would work around the clock to try to keep up I’m working from that’d be the work at 830 in meetings all day, and then pick my daughter up, bring her home, do mommy duties homework stuff, and then I’m doing part two of my second shift and working at night. And the culture while it wasn’t stated, you know, but it was it was just like you, you work, you got to get the job done no matter what. And I felt like I wasn’t able to fully step in and make a difference. Because there were there was so many problems, from communications to, you know, little cliques to was, if I could be honest, like, you have to know what to say and how to say it into who and it’s just like, when you come in there, you don’t know that you’re stepping on a lot of tools, because it’s just like, why is this work? And like this, this? This doesn’t sound right. Let’s try to do this. And it’s just like, No, this is how we have always done it. This is how it gets done. You need to fall in line.
Kelly Meerbott 13:37:36
Yeah. And so I don’t know, if I were till I like I can relate to this so much. I don’t know if I ever told you that I was I think I did, where I was called by the city of Philadelphia is planning and development department to help roll up these nine agencies under one to basically make the resources that they all have access to more powerful. So more buying power, basically, they’ve been trying to do this for 22 years. And City Council finally came in and said, You’re gonna get this done by July. Well, they called on me and the US like we started in October before and people would say that to me, they’d be like, we’ve always done it this way. And I go and that’s why I’m here. Because it’s not working. Right or the the other the other one that always made me giggle is they would say was it an election year because it was the second cycle of Mayor Kenny’s, you know candidacy and I? My response being a smart aleck is I didn’t see your name on the ballot. Are you running? Oh, my God. They would say Well, no. Okay, well, then there’s no excuse. We’ve got till July to get this done. Let’s go. Right. Oh, yeah. I mean, there is a lot of red tape. And it feels like it’s for me, it felt very unnecessary. And this was me just being an outside consultant. So I can’t even imagine, like you’re coming in and think you’re going to make things better. And really, you’re walking through a field of landmines blindfolded.
Raphaela Browne 13:39:14
Every single day, I was stepping on a landmine every single day. And it really, it really, like crushed my esteem, my self esteem because I was, you know, like we talked about earlier, you know, good girl, I get things done. You know, I excel I achieve. And in my past job, you know, I really, you know, I’ve worked with teams, and I had just left somewhere where the team that I worked with were, they were appreciative. And I felt like I’ve moved some things and made some changes. And there was a staff person, you know, who before I love, because one thing that he said to me, he said, you know, you helped me so much. You helped me figure out what I want to do outside of this work, because I always told him, like, you’re not gonna be working here, you’re gonna go off and do something else. Your job is not to stay here. And he started his own photography business. And he’s like, you know, out of this world, he’s really doing well now. But the question he left was with me is like, You’ve helped me so much to figure out like, what it is that I want to do and how to go about doing it. What do you want to do and I’ve really had to sit with that. And so because I was so used to the path of like, you get a job, you work a nine to five, you work your way up. So I started looking for a job that was a little bit higher. And when I got it, which is where I went, I was like, oh, here I am. And then I got there was like, No, you’re not.
Kelly Meerbott 13:40:54
Right. I mean, like, God, and I don’t know if you have this moment, and I don’t want to feed it to you. But this is the moment I had when I hit leadership and corporate. Because I was in corporate radio for 11 years. I got there. And I was like, This is not what I thought it was like, right? So like, this is not what I imagined, in my mind. Now, sitting here in this chair, building this business and doing the projects that I’m doing with you. This is what I saw, you know, but you and I both had to go and do our own thing. So okay, so you get to that role. And can you? Are you comfortable sharing where it was? And we were doing?
Raphaela Browne 13:41:37
Well, I won’t put out the organization’s name. Okay. But I will say I was, I was director of programs over the it was with the Summer Work Ready program, in addition to they had programs for, for you to just help prepare them career oriented print programs to help prepare them, you know,
Kelly Meerbott 13:42:05
was it a nonprofit? Can you say that it was
Raphaela Browne 13:42:08
a nonprofit, but it definitely operated like corporate, you know, because they were connected with the city, the school district. I mean, because of their relationship, money flowing in. And when you have all this money flowing in, and you made all these agreements to like, Okay, you got to do this, you got to do that. Like I was never able to fully focus. It’s just like, you’re constantly all over the place. And it was just like, what is it that you guys really do, because I find myself not doing anything that I’m supposed to do in this role. I feel pulled at different ways. I keep stepping on landmines I keep. The other thing that really like, made me feel like self conscious, once again, was just like, you know, the whole environment of like, you got to, you know, speak up or constantly talk and say something, because if you’re talking to saying something, even if it’s no value, it appears that you know, I guess you’re doing something, so I’m more observant. I like to peep out like what’s going on Listen, thoughtful in an intentional now, it took me a minute to own that, you know, but during that time, I started feeling like, well, what’s wrong with listening? What’s wrong with asking questions? What’s wrong with that? And it was the type of environment where it’s just like, No, if you’re not out there and talking, and putting your voice in the room, and in the way that they want it, then
Kelly Meerbott 13:43:47
yeah, so I mean, I’m shaking my head, because I totally understand. And like, I don’t know, when you’re working with your clients, because you’re a beautiful coach and do incredible work, which is why, you know, we’re doing the projects we’re doing together, because you’re world class, and you’re great at what you do. But you know, I work with the military, and like, the word that they use is visibility and influence, visibility and influence is the same kind of thing where they literally want this very toxic masculine leadership, where it’s like, boom, here’s my stake in the ground. Here’s the word vomit in the meeting. That means I’m doing stuff now. Right? So my approach is very different. It’s like, speak when you have something pertinent to say, not just own the room and center yourself in the conversation because you’re this great human, and let your work speak for itself. Exactly. Do the work. Let it speak for itself. And I promise the visibility and influence will come because you don’t need to go in there and talk to hear yourself talk and grandstand and be ridiculous and posture, you know, and to your point. I mean, like you and I both know, communication. 8% of that is nonverbal. So when I go to observe an organization, I do a lot of like keeping my mouth shut and just watching and listening and hearing when the words they’re using to create the reality within the organization. So you’re there, right? They’re pushing you to serve docs and conform. What are you feeling sigh like, how is that feeling for you?
Raphaela Browne 13:45:33
Oh my goodness. I’m, like, I’m speaking hindsight. But you know, just during that moment, during that time there, I just felt so like, not useful, less than not value. Like, I’ve wondered if I had any strengths because I was just like, what’s going on? I don’t fit at all. And I was thinking like, well, something’s wrong with me that I can’t keep up with all of the, the constant changes in movement and being able to just say, whatever in meetings. I was just like, something’s wrong. It really crushed my spirit. It totally crushed my spirit.
Kelly Meerbott 13:46:21
I’m so sorry. But actually, because I know I know the story, right? You’ve told me this before. I know. It’s also the launch pad for what you’re what you’re supposed to do. But this also reminds me. So I’ve got great friend and colleague, her name is Gabby, right? And she is she’s a woman of color. She’s dancer. And I heard her tell this story. And as I was listening to you, I was like, This sounds like Gabby’s story. Gabby would go into these ballet classes, and she just didn’t fit. And she was like, went through the whole thing right now. Whereas I never be a dancer. I love to dance, bla bla bla bla bla. And her mom said, Well, maybe you’re not a ballet dancer. Maybe you’re a jazz, maybe you’re improv. And she went into that, and literally excelled. She’s be a beautiful dancer. She travels now all over the country adjudicating dance contests. And it’s like, well, yes, you are valued. You, you you, we see you, we appreciate you. But you don’t fit in our box. So all of a sudden, you and I and Gabby, sit there and go, Okay, well, I guess we’re not worth it. Like the words were that you were used to me is your aggressive and abrasive. Yet my male white male counterparts would do the same thing. And they were geniuses. It’s like, give him the Pulitzer. And I was like, literally, I just said that I said that thing in the same way, but it’s not okay, coming for me, I don’t understand so and that crushed my spirit. But I will tell you, and I know, you know this, and I can’t wait to hear your thoughts on it. But when we have those dark night of the soul moments, it’s very character defining. So okay, so you’re going through that you’re sitting in this mock, that’s not created by you. You question every fiber of your being what happens from that moment?
Raphaela Browne 13:48:16
Well, as I continued to try to keep up because then I was at a point where I was just like, what, let me show them, like, I can do this, like, I gotta prove myself, like, they can, I’m gonna show them. And so even though things were totally dysfunctional, you know, I would craft, you know, proposals for how I can work best and this and that, and, you know, they would shoot it down. Like, look, this is the way it is, you know, you know, you just gotta figure out how to get with it, you know, for lack of a better word, the the lowest moment was because I was trying to prove myself, lack of sleep, totally stress, and continue to step on landmine. So I was like, Oh, I’m failing. But also, at home as a mother, I wasn’t keeping up with that part. And I remember my daughter saying, like, you’re like, you’re always so cranky, and always so busy. Like, I don’t like that job for you. She was eight at the time. She was like, I don’t like that job for you. And I just like started crying. Because I was like, I’m not doing anything. Right.
Kelly Meerbott 13:49:36
What’s your daughter’s name?
Raphaela Browne 13:49:37
Get Gabrielle. I call her Gabby.
Kelly Meerbott 13:49:40
So Angel Gabriel. Right. So, you know, from the mouths of babes. Like, okay, so you have that moment. And I mean, like, even as you’re talking about, I could feel that probably hit you right in your heart, you know? So and sometimes it takes those moments like, I remember when I got laid off from corporate and my husband was, was deployed to Guantanamo Bay working with a 911 detainees, and he called me. He didn’t know it was going down and all of that and he finally gets a hold of me and he says, are you done? And I was like, done with why? And he goes, working for stupid bosses. And they go, What do you mean, he goes, You should start your own business. And I’m like, Oh, sure. Just start my own business. Well, the great thing about for Jinya was that Mark Warner who used to own neck style. He was an, you know, an entrepreneur himself made Virginia, number eight in the country for starting businesses. So it literally was that easy. But okay, so Angel Gabriel comes in and says, Mom, you’re cranky, you’re stressed stress, which is basically her way of saying, I don’t see you anymore. Like, I don’t see us, like, not fit, but see you the beautiful loving essence that we all see now. That hits you in the heart, where do you go from there? Oh,
Raphaela Browne 13:51:06
goodness, I was just like, something’s got to give. And, like, I’m, I never really knew about it. I think I just I don’t know, I started researching because I was like, I need to see a therapist or something like, I have to figure out what to do, because I knew I needed to leave there. But at the same time, I was a single parent responsible for all the finances, and I’m just like, What am I going to do? Because I can’t stay here. And so I found a coach, it was actually a colleague, and she, she was coaching and, you know, like really talking to someone and having them like, process or feedback to you like what you’re saying or break it down. And she was the one who was just like, well, Raphaela, it’s is not a good fit for you. That’s all that’s just not the workplace for you to thrive in. And she was the one who said you’re, you’re thoughtful in your approach. You’re intentional, you need space to think and be creative. And she said, and that’s okay. She said is nothing wrong with like with having that approach. And I’m trying to remember who she brought up, but it you know, she was saying like, there are all types of leaders, and you don’t have to be the one who’s like that there are some powerful people in leadership, who are those thoughtful, you know, intentional, and they get done, you know? And I was just like, wow,
Kelly Meerbott 13:52:48
yes,
Raphaela Browne 13:52:49
there’s a place for me.
Kelly Meerbott 13:52:51
Yeah. Oh, honey. Yeah, that’s 100%. And I will add to that list, heart and soul lead. I mean, that was something that, like, as soon as we connected, I was like, Oh, I love that. You know, and here’s what I am also know is that empathy, compassion, love and creating belonging is where I think the world is going right now. Like, I think we’re going through our dark night of the soul. Well, yeah. I think there’s more. And you and I both know, there’s excessive demand on our time right now, because of the mental health. I mean, we haven’t even gotten into the mental health piece of it. Listen, you know, I mean, like, and I just read a statistic that 68% of the global population are burnt out. And the majority of those are women, which, I mean, you’re a badass in your own right, but like to run a business and raise a daughter. I mean, that is tremendous. On its own, and we’re not even talking about the personal Raphaela, like, looking for love or right. What do you want for yourself? And how do you want to show up? So? Yeah, okay, so we have the coach, the coach has that defining moment, which, you know, I think all of us have that in our stories, which I love. Okay, where do you go from there so you realize ballet is not for you.
Raphaela Browne 13:54:22
You talking about? It set me free? It set me free from about, you know, thinking about what you said earlier, like, I’ve been in a freakin box, all of my life. I did what I was supposed to do, because that’s what society says and you know, you go to school, get good grades, you go to college, you get a job, this net. And the thing about it is, you know, all in my life, I never felt like I fit in, you know, anywhere, you know, just just always felt different. And so, to get to that point, and to have confirmation, like, be free, go do what you need to do, because this place is has you in jail, right? This is not where you belong. And so from there, once she we talked about values, that was the other thing that set me free and I was just like, Yeah, my values are my family, being A great mother. If I’m not a great mother and present Mother, let me say a present mother, then what does any of this means money doesn’t mean nothing. doing great work doesn’t mean anything. I need to be present for my daughter. I need to have space and flexibility in my life to breathe to create. You know, like I like to write, I like to be creative. I like to be strategic. And I need room to breathe to do that. And so, what once I was clear on that, what I did was like, Oh, well, let me figure out how to get the hell up out of here. And again, it was scary. I’m not gonna say like, it was easy, because again, a single parent. I was like, So I prayed. I was like, No, God, you got me. And this is some tough situation, like, what am I supposed to do? And, you know, what I did is not for everyone. But it was when it was super clear that it was time for me to go. Then I just made the decision. I said, I’m leaving. I don’t have a security besides my savings and stuff. But I just knew I was going to be all right. So it was like fake. It was like, I can’t describe it.
Kelly Meerbott 13:56:56
Can you okay? Because, you know, one of the things that I do with my clients, I don’t know if you do this as I try to mark things in their bodies. So meaning, like when you keep repeating freedom, I felt free, right? Well, what emotions and physical sensations does that feel like to you? Because if we can say to our audience, like, listen, here’s what not being free looks like. burnt out stressed. Aren’t my daughter, my eight year old daughter saying you’re not here? You’re cranky. I am feeling literally crazy.
Raphaela Browne 13:57:32
suffocated. Yes. losing my mind. Okay, so
Kelly Meerbott 13:57:36
tell me in contrast, what that freedom felt, what emotions and physical sensations came up. So it wouldn’t help if I give you an example for me. Go ahead. So when when I kind of sat with it, and like because I got laid off, like they, they had to push me out, you know, because I’m hard headed. And that’s the way the universe does it. But when I feel free, or I’m really confident a decision, everything kind of gets quiet. I’m really peaceful. And it’s like, it’s like my body, every part of every realm, Heart Soul spirit, just exhales like, that’s what it feels like. So what did it feel like for you?
Raphaela Browne 13:58:20
It was like, someone came or in like, lifted the weight, or, like, Here you go. That wasn’t free to carry no more. I felt so light. I felt so like, and I keep doing this because it was like, in my heart in my chest, like flutters like, just like, you know, like, breathe in and just like, I can move, I can flow. I am clear. And with clarity, I was decisive. And so I moved. I just move forward.
Kelly Meerbott 13:59:06
And how did how did your confidence shift? Because like, you say, You’re decisive, and they have those moments to words like I was telling you, I exhale, and it’s like, Nope, this is the decision. This is it. And like, there’s literally no question and I know it’s God’s way of talking to me, because it’s intuition. I’m in that so for you, like what did it do? You were talking about how these these series of positions hit your self worth and self esteem? What did it do? What did that awareness that awakening, that exhale that freedom that expansiveness do for your self esteem?
Raphaela Browne 13:59:43
I though, and what’s coming up for me is, well, I knew I didn’t fit in there, you know, it was like, and that’s okay, like, this isn’t my place. I felt like I had my own place of belonging. And I get to create that for myself. So it was just like my confidence went all the way up and it was almost like, you know, just like I’m so over here. Like, why am I even here? Like, what did I was I do it, you know, start looking at life through a different lens now, and so would all the work in the running around that they were doing I was just like, yeah, It’s not for me. Almost like a little like, you know, it’s not for me. Yeah, I’m all I’m all this.
Kelly Meerbott 14:00:39
Yeah. And it’s almost immediate too. And then, yeah, like for me after I got laid off, I remember calling the HR director three weeks later to find out about my severance and unemployment and all that. And I remember when she picked up the phone, like, and again, this is probably me projecting, but she sounded like she was about to jump off a cliff like with all of the crap that was going on. And I was like, Was I that miserable? Oh, my God, I was that miserable. And I took that moment to be like, that was known for you. You know, of course, you go through the grieving process and all that, because when you’re laid off, but Okay, so how do you leverage that defining moment, in your work that you do now at Raphaela Browne enterprises?
Raphaela Browne 14:01:26
Oh, my goodness. So once I knew that I was going to leave there and the way that happened, that was nothing but divine intervention, because I was like, I went to HR and I was just like, I’m, I’m going to be out. And she was like, Whoa, let’s figure this out. Long story short, they were doing a reorg. You know, they were constantly doing like, reorg. And, and I was like, Oh, well, I’m gonna need to apply for anything here. Because I don’t fit. And anyway, the way that happened, I was able to leave and get a package and be okay. So once I left there, even before I knew I was going to do coaching, because from having that coach, it brought me back to all the work I’ve done with teams, like what sad, you know, really, it was just something that was natural, you know, looking and working with people and seeing what was within, right. I always said to, like I said to my team, you’re not going to be at this organization Forever, forever, your job is to excel me, and go off and do something else. Like, let’s be real. So what outside of we can figure out like how you can do your job exceptionally well, and how you can bring your strengths and talents and pieces of you to this role. But what else are you into? And that’s where conversations would come up. And people, you know, they, we, we click it work. And so when I remember that, and the joy I got from that, and the joy to seeing how people came out of their shell, they were using their strengths and talents in the workplace and outside of work, and having the space to grow. I said, I want to do this all the time. All the time. I want to help the underdog or people who feel like they’re not good enough or people who feel stifled
Kelly Meerbott 14:03:30
all the time. Yeah. And you know, I love what you said about excelling. I had one good boss and corporate and 11 years. And I remember he said a version of that. And it came full circle because he applied for his final job before he retired. And he called me and was like, Would you do a letter of reference for me, and I’m like, I would do anything for you. Worse. But he said to me, I remember the first day he said, You’re not going to be here long. And honestly, I’d have offended I was like, and he was like you’re gonna parlay this into something better. That’s my job as your leader and I think I think leaders of a lot of times will lose sight of that and not understand that their job is to build the next generation of leaders, whatever that looks like. So you got that? I mean, like, you lit and I know you live that so Okay, last question that I’m gonna go into rapid fire, which are really fun questions. Okay. So, if imagine there’s a single mother out there, maybe she’s a woman of color, maybe she’s not it doesn’t matter what that’s experiencing exactly what you’re experiencing before your awakening and your coach came in and kind of pulled back the curtain. What would you say to to her? You know that struggling in her position? What would you say?
Raphaela Browne 14:04:58
What comes to mind first is for her to take a deep breath, exhale. And then what is it that you really want in need for your life? If there were no limits, if get rid of what society and your parents and whoever else told you? It was it was supposed to be? Forget all that. What is it that you really want in me and have her Go with it in told me.
Kelly Meerbott 14:05:33
Yeah. Now okay, let’s take one step further. Imagine Gabrielle is going through this. Let’s fast forward like I am assuming she’s not eight
Raphaela Browne 14:05:44
anymore. No, she’s 16. Now.
Kelly Meerbott 14:05:47
So now like she’s got a couple of years before she goes to college, and then she’s getting into the workforce and she finds herself in a similar situation, what would you say to her?
Raphaela Browne 14:05:58
Go do go where you’re, you’re valued. If you’re not able to thrive in a situation, excuse me, if you’re not able to thrive? Do you feel stifled if you’re not able to show up as your best self? Leave? You don’t have to say leave.
Kelly Meerbott 14:06:18
And guess what, we’re in a time in history when the power is with the people.
Raphaela Browne 14:06:24
Exactly. Great resignation.
Kelly Meerbott 14:06:26
I mean, like I was at a dinner last night for a friend with a journalist from CNN, another woman who worked for in the CNN journalists used to chase tornadoes. And I was like, you gotta tell me stories about that. And then there was another woman who works in the mayor’s office in the city of New York, I forget what she does. I think she works with like, diverse, equitable, inclusive and marginalized populations. She’s leaving, I have another guy who was sitting next to me that did intake for University of Pennsylvania Hospital, leaving I was like, which is, which is great, because they’re all going to do things wildly different, like this journalist is leaving journalism, because she’s burnt out and she’s gonna do music. The other one really wants to do something more creative. She doesn’t know what she wants. And I was I was like, I’ll work with you. It’ll be fine. Either one wants to be a sound engineer. It’s some kind of creative expression. So yes, I think I think there’s so much potential for all of that. And there’s always room for that as well. Okay. So I could tell you know, we could go on and on talk for hours, like because we just I love you so much. Oh, I love you. Just grateful for you. Like just I feel like I just take a love bath every time. I’m just I know, it’s the best thing I can come up with right now. Like, I’m so limited and like how you make me feel and and I think in our work, one of the hardest things to deal with is having a limited vocabulary to match feelings, right? Like, you know, something comes up and you’re like, Okay, how do I mean that because it’s so many different things. And it doesn’t make sense, but it’s all this energy that’s kind of flowing inside me. But okay, rapid fire questions. So these are fun. Okay. What’s your favorite comfort food,
Raphaela Browne 14:08:20
chocolate with almonds in it Cadbury
Kelly Meerbott 14:08:24
Oh, Cadbury, okay, so we like milk chocolate.
Raphaela Browne 14:08:27
I like milk chocolate.
Kelly Meerbott 14:08:30
All right, what books are on your nightstand right now?
Raphaela Browne 14:08:34
Oh, my goodness. I have the I’m looking back at it right now. So I have the the One Minute Millionaire. I have, you know, what is the one F is for failure, but it really talks about you know, failure is not exactly what you think it is. I have it’s Valerie Burton successful women think differently, which is a great read. Those are coming off the top of my head.
Kelly Meerbott 14:09:08
No, those are great. Okay, what songs are in your playlist?
14:09:14
My favorite So 90s r&b is my absolute favorite. So if we’re, we’re talking about it could be Bobby Brown. It can be Jagged Edge high five, just boys. The men
Kelly Meerbott 14:09:32
taking me back sister, New Edition. That was the time I was in radio from in the like late 90s, early 2000s. Like, yeah, all of that. And we had our r&b station that I helped promote. So yeah, I mean, that’s all good stuff. Okay, what are you most grateful for in this moment right now.
14:09:56
In this moment, being able to share my story. So being able to let others know that you can carve your own path. And you don’t have to look like any or be like anyone else. There’s room for you.
Kelly Meerbott 14:10:10
Yeah. I love that. And like what I say is, you know, stop living other people’s stories. Yes, you know, that’s not your property. Like I realized I was living out my parents money story. That’s not my story. That was something that I got from them. So drop that and let’s write a new story. So and that’s that’s another thing. I love about you is like, you’re like this doesn’t fit. Okay? Right and in your story. So if somebody wanted to reach out to you and work with you as a coach for either their team or themselves, how would they get in touch with you?
14:10:46
They could definitely they can email me at info at Raphaelabrowne.com They can find me on LinkedIn as a great place you could find me on LinkedIn again at Raphaela at Browne. My website Raphaela Browne, Instagram Raphaela Browne,
Kelly Meerbott 14:11:02
because your your first name is spelled in an unusual way. So I want to make sure everybody can get you because let me tell you, if you are looking for our coach with heart Love, who’s amazing, that’s going to give you an incredible ROI and your dollar Raphaela is that like She’s incredible. So I would not hesitate to reach out for her to her for anything. So spell your website URL because we can get to everything else through that correct? Yes. Okay, so if you could smell that, that’d be great. So,
Raphaela Browne 14:11:32
so Raphaela is Raphaela br o wn. E.
Kelly Meerbott 14:11:43
Yes, the incredible Raphaela Browne. And I know that Raphaela and I had the intention that this conversation was going to inspire our audience and our listeners to go out and have connecting conversations to really deepen the emotional connections and in their lives and Raphaela thank you so much for your time. Thank you for listening to hidden human the stories behind the business leader and you will be back soon with another episode. But I hope you all loved being with Raphaela as much as I did.
Raphaela Browne 14:12:15
I appreciate you. Thank you so much for having me, Kelly,
Kelly Meerbott 14:12:18
thank you.
14:12:35
You’ve been listening to hidden human, the stories behind the business leader. If you’ve enjoyed the episode, please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. To learn more about Kelly and the services she provides. Visit you loud and clear.com Thanks so much for listening, and we’ll be back soon with a new episode.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/toggle][/toggles][/vc_column][/vc_row]
